Offering Services In-Office and via Skype, Webcam, Google, and Phone with offices at:

516 Route 303, Orangeburg, NY 10962 in Rockland County

(near Nyack, Blauvelt, Nanuet, New City, 10960, 10913, 10954, 10956, and Northern NJ)

and at 10 West Shore Drive, Putnam Valley, NY (lower Putnam County)

(minutes from Yorktown Heights & Katonah, NY, 10598 & 10536, Westchester)

                                                                david@davidswilde.com

            845-825-0599

Sexual Addiction & Pornography Addiction Coaching

Sexual addiction occurs when the sexual experience has become the driving force of a person’s whole life to the detriment of their health, partner, children, friends or their job.  Sex addicts are people who have lost the ability to really choose the when, where, why and with whom they wish to be sexual.

          With sexual and pornography addiction, the addict will turn to the illusionary world of sex and fantasy.  Escape from the real world brings temporary relief but escaping too often solidifies a habit and so escape eventually becomes addictive.  This is similar to how an addiction to alcohol or drugs masks the underlying pain of feeling hurt, betrayed, worried or truly lonely.  The main issue of pornography and sex addiction is not the need for more sex, rather, it is to control and avoid deep shame, often unconscious, and relational pain..  It can be the addict’s attempt to avoid the pain often caused by genuine intimacy.  The sex addict is essentially creating a false replacement relationship with someone or something that can be controlled and manipulated; such as a picture, a video or a prostitute. 

          Addiction is often a family disease.  Sex addicts often come from families where addiction, abandonment, neglect and abuse are normal.  The parents, grandparents, siblings, or extended family may struggle with eating disorders, nicotine addiction, drug abuse, alcoholism, gambling, mental health challenges, or compulsive sex.   Odds are that with sex addiction there exists a combination of addictive or maladaptive behaviors.

          Sexual or pornography addiction can strike anyone, from all social classes at any income level.  Do you identify with these behaviors?

• Having an affair, either with one-night stands or ongoing sexual liaisons outside of marriage or other committed relationship.  Even masturbation can become compulsive and require treatment if it interferes with your normal life and relationships with others.

• Engaging in sex with prostitutes, escorts, massage therapists or others, online or in-person, sometimes exhausting the time and money that are needed for housing, food, provisions for children and other necessities of daily life.

• Compulsive use of the Internet for viewing pornography and/or engaging in “cybersex” in chatrooms, via email, instant/text messaging (i.e.“sexting”) or using Skype, etc.

• Voyeurism, exhibitionism, indecent phone calls or other compulsive, inappropriate and sometimes illegal activity that produces sexual arousal.

• Excessive “sexualizing” by flirting frequently and compulsively or having an obsessional and excessive focus on, or interest in, sexual arousal.

• Frequenting adult bookstores, X-rated movie theatres, phone sex lines or other sexually-oriented businesses for sexual excitement or sexual activity.

• Having a feeling of leading a sexual double life separate from family, spouse or partner, where lies and deception take over while constantly guarding against being found out.

          Addicts who engage in these behaviors can feel tremendous guilt, shame, distress, despair, and may even have suicidal thoughts just after the acting out their addicting behavior.  In these respects, sexual addiction is similar to an addiction to food, alcohol, drugs, gambling, compulsive shopping or spending or even excessive workaholism.  Eventually sexual addiction can result in the threat of divorce, loss of employment, financial disaster and sometimes even possible criminal prosecution.

          Please don’t despair if any of the above behaviors applies to you.  Help is available and change really is possible.  But healing is necessary.  I provide counseling and coaching which has proven very effective for these issues for my clients through telephone sessions all across the U.S.A. as well as in my office locations in New York City, NY in midtown Manhattan, Hudson and Bergen Counties, New Jersey and Bucks County, PA. All sessions are entirely confidential, private, and safe. Upon your request, I will not take any notes or maintain any records of the content of our sessions.

          Counseling and Coaching addresses the root cause of sex addiction from the present, here-and-now perspective, which can be the unresolved emotional logjams that keep you from truly connecting with other people. This is the healing that needs to occur order for you to be free from sex or pornography addiction.

          My counseling and coaching focuses on helping you learn how to cope with your life and relationships without escaping into an imaginary world of artificial sexual satisfaction.  You will learn again to tell sexual reality from fantasy and will never be duped again into accepting false love.

          I would be more than happy to talk with you about the successful approach I use to heal the issues that result in these addictions in a free and confidential phone call.

           Click on the following to learn about my Telephone & Skype Sessions All Across the U.S.A.

Sliding scale fees are available for those who can't afford my regular fees. I will work with you to come up with something affordable if I feel that I can help you.

I try to turn no one away whom I feel that I can help.

“A spiritual psychotherapist, able to combine all aspects of the human being… The therapy was a wonderful tool to help our marriage to reach deep levels of honesty and stuffed feelings… We enjoyed the sessions, healing experience, had fun & gut level honesty/work…A safe environment with a spiritual foundation was felt in your sessions.” Mary-Ellen indicated that what really worked for her was, “Having my feelings being validated, being heard, feeling safe & not judged.”  ~ Mary-Ellen M.